THE CONFEDERATION OF BASEBALL DUNCES
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09/05/2047
 
San Antonio Held Hitless by Gordam
Tuesday, September 3rd , 2047
In a dominant outing, Karl Gordam of the Dublin Porters totally silenced the bats of the San Antonio Aztecs, finishing with a no-hitter.

In the 4-0 victory, Gordam faced only 29 batters, surrendered no hits, had 16 strikeouts and 2 walks.

"Honestly, I didn't even know the situation was what it was until the seventh inning," Dublin manager Jim DG said. "I happened to look up there to see how many hits we had gotten, and I happened to notice that they hadn't gotten any."

Commenting on the defeat, losing manager Jim Lumo told reporters in the clubhouse that he had a "simple" analysis of the game.

"The Porters had all the hits and all the runs, so they won," he snapped. "But yeah, Gordam pitched a heck of a ballgame."

Over the season Gordam has thrown 191 innings and dished out 289 strikeouts with a 15-6 mark and a 3.91 ERA.

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92's End Gonzalez Streak
Monday, September 2nd , 2047
The Brooklyn Knights lost to the Saskatchewan 92's, 8-6, at Stadium 92, but perhaps the bigger news was the end of Esteban Gonzalez's 27-game hitting streak. The right fielder went 0-for-1 on the day.

"We felt if we could slow down Gonzalez, we would win the game," 92's manager Salvador Rubio explained. "They really seemed to feed off his streak, so we tried to put more emphasis on shutting him down."

This season, Gonzalez is batting .359 with 172 hits, 37 home runs, 84 RBIs, .433 OBP and has scored 100 runs.
Weekly Team Power Rankings
Monday, September 2nd , 2047
Here are the current team power rankings for The Confederation of Baseball Dunces:

Teams (Total Points, Tendency):
1) St. Louis Archies (129.2, o)
2) San Antonio Aztecs (104.4, +)
3) Kyiv Cossacks (104.1, -)
4) Hanoi Dragon Warriors (97.8, o)
5) Brooklyn Knights (97.2, +)
6) Detroit Pizzas (95.5, o)
7) Dublin Porters (95.0, +)
8) Saskatchewan 92's (94.2, +)
9) Sudbury Blueberry Bulldogs (93.9, o)
10) Buffalo Buffalo (92.9, --)
11) Pittsburgh Yinzers (82.5, +)
12) Havana Sugar Kings (80.2, -)
13) East Haddam Hyenas (75.0, o)
14) Los Angeles Kings (71.9, +)
15) Lansing Red Storm (70.6, +)
16) Memphis Chicks (56.7, -)
LEAGUE LEADERS AVG
2 tied with
.363
1 Brian Nadeau STL .363
1 Sam Clark MEM .363
3 Esteban Gonzalez BKK .359
4 Chris Adams DET .353
LEAGUE LEADERS HR
Jason Engels - HSK
40
2 Esteban Gonzalez BKK 37
3 Won-shik Im SKW 36
4 Kyle Alcala CSS 35
4 Josh Deere SUD 35
LEAGUE LEADERS RBI
Josh Deere - SUD
122
2 Kyle Alcala CSS 114
3 Brian Cifelli SA 103
3 Jason Engels HSK 103
5 William Melnick CSS 98
LEAGUE LEADERS W
Spencer Hay - STL
17
2 Phil Beard DET 16
3 Kevin Feltes BUF 15
3 Karl Gordam DUB 15
5 7 tied with   12
LEAGUE LEADERS ERA
Phil Beard - DET
2.57
2 Justin Kowalick SA 2.72
3 Kevin Feltes BUF 2.99
4 Nick Rennie HAN 3.04
5 Spencer Hay STL 3.08
LEAGUE LEADERS K
Karl Gordam - DUB
289
2 Jim Steeb BKK 206
3 Glenn DePue BUF 205
4 Nick Rennie HAN 204
5 Mike Ricketts STL 203
NEWS
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ALLIANCE LEAGUE STANDINGS
Boneheads Division W L PCT GB
Hanoi Dragon Warriors 71 56 .559 -
Detroit Pizzas 69 58 .543 2.0
Brooklyn Knights 64 63 .504 7.0
Havana Sugar Kings 57 70 .449 14.0
Dimwits Division W L PCT GB
San Antonio Aztecs 70 57 .551 -
Buffalo Buffalo 69 58 .543 1.0
Pittsburgh Yinzers 60 67 .472 10.0
Los Angeles Kings 52 75 .409 18.0
FEDERATION LEAGUE STANDINGS
Knuckleheads Division W L PCT GB
Kyiv Cossacks 73 54 .575 -
Dublin Porters 67 60 .528 6.0
Saskatchewan 92's 66 61 .520 7.0
East Haddam Hyenas 50 77 .394 23.0
Birdbrains Division W L PCT GB
St. Louis Archies 82 45 .646 -
Sudbury Blueberry Bulldogs 69 58 .543 13.0
Lansing Red Storm 49 78 .386 33.0
Memphis Chicks 48 79 .378 34.0
YESTERDAY'S GAMES - Federation League
Away Team Home Team Result Time Winning Pitcher Losing Pitcher
San Antonio Dublin 16-8 7:05 PM ET J.Griese (10-9, 4.58 ERA) G.Sebera (12-8, 5.15 ERA)
Pittsburgh East Haddam 3-0 7:05 PM ET B.Collins (10-12, 4.71 ERA) E.Hernandez (8-10, 5.07 ERA)
Havana Lansing 8-5 7:05 PM ET K.Tae (7-6, 4.04 ERA) K.Meadors (2-5, 7.51 ERA)
Hanoi Memphis 4-1 7:05 PM ET N.Rennie (12-4, 3.04 ERA) D.Elliott (5-13, 4.79 ERA)
Buffalo Sudbury 5-4 7:05 PM ET G.DePue (12-12, 4.76 ERA) N.Gonzalez (3-1, 4.03 ERA)
TODAY'S GAMES - Alliance League
Away Team Home Team Time Starting Pitcher Away Team Starting Pitcher Home Team
Brooklyn (64-63, Road: 22-39) Hanoi (71-56, Home: 38-26) 7:05 PM ET LHP A.Rodriguez (10-7, 3.84 ERA) LHP S.Thomas (10-6, 4.70 ERA)
Detroit (69-58, Road: 31-28) Havana (57-70, Home: 30-32) 7:05 PM ET RHP N.Spinks (8-12, 3.69 ERA) RHP L.Lezama (8-3, 4.35 ERA)
Pittsburgh (60-67, Road: 22-42) Buffalo (69-58, Home: 41-20) 7:05 PM ET RHP D.Coffman (8-5, 5.30 ERA) LHP J.Pierce (4-9, 5.72 ERA)
San Antonio (70-57, Road: 28-34) Los Angeles (52-75, Home: 33-26) 7:05 PM ET LHP D.Moses (9-7, 4.41 ERA) LHP J.Valer (8-9, 4.81 ERA)
TODAY'S GAMES - Federation League
Away Team Home Team Time Starting Pitcher Away Team Starting Pitcher Home Team
Kyiv (73-54, Road: 32-32) Dublin (67-60, Home: 37-24) 7:05 PM ET RHP E.Hartman (8-8, 7.29 ERA) LHP J.Hendsbee (7-4, 3.48 ERA)
Saskatchewan (66-61, Road: 32-30) East Haddam (50-77, Home: 27-32) 7:05 PM ET RHP J.Potter (8-9, 5.41 ERA) RHP B.Delaney (2-4, 5.60 ERA)
Lansing (49-78, Road: 23-38) St. Louis (82-45, Home: 44-20) 7:05 PM ET RHP A.Martinez (5-14, 5.82 ERA) RHP M.Verdin (11-9, 4.55 ERA)
Memphis (48-79, Road: 19-40) Sudbury (69-58, Home: 33-29) 7:05 PM ET RHP G.Krajancic (2-11, 7.18 ERA) RHP J.Freeland (12-4, 3.78 ERA)
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