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Archies Star Wrecks One-Of-A-Kind Car Monday, November 16th , 2048 St. Louis star Jim Stanton is known for his hard-driving play on the field, but after what happened this week, he should probably drive a little more carefully on the roads. The star third baseman was driving late at night on a winding road and smashed right into a highway barrier. He escaped with only scrapes and bruises and is listed as day-to-day, but the bigger injuries are to his wallet and his pride--the car, which was completely totaled, was a custom-built luxury BMW valued at half a million dollars. He angrily declined to take questions as he limped out of an St. Louis-area hospital last night, but his publicist released the following statement: "Jim is happy to be home with his family, and knows how lucky he is to have escaped nearly unhurt. He will be more careful in the future, and he knows that cars, unlike people, can always be replaced." Maybe so, but if he wants to be able to replace this one, he may need to drive a hard bargain when he next comes to the negotiating table. |
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